So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
