I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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