I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
