He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize