I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Bring me that man meat
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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