He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
