JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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