waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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