he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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