Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sobbing to NWA
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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