I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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