So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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