Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
