I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
