I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
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