Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So squirting runs in the family.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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