Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(440): View more from Ohio

im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs

Fav 7 1008 2593
share tweet
(619): View more from California

I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.

Fav 15 7173 1844
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(615): View more from Tennessee

I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.

Fav 3 2197 1176
share tweet
(802): View more from Vermont

Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?

(401): View more from Rhode Island

Those memories are both hazy and awesome.

Fav 6 2162 812
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(847): View more from Illinois

I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...

Fav 6 2789 992
share tweet
(903): View more from Texas

Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.

Fav 9 3879 1166
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(718): View more from New York

I don't deserve a penis

Fav 6 673 1310
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.

Fav 1 378 174
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....

Fav 0 33 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT