Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
