you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
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matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
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You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I have aggressive nipples.
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