the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
