I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
