i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
