Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
