Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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