I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
