Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
