One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
