But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
someone owes me an orgasm
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Randomize
