Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
