Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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