We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
