when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
we're so committed to being not committed
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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