i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize