Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he laminated a picture of his dick.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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