he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
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she said she was living bicuriously through me.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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