Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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