Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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