Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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