it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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