It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
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