so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
