my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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