Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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