i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
