i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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