so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
