why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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