So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Someone stole a lamp last night.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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