I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
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For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
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This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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