I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize